We think it is crucial to address current issues with funerals. The main one is that they have become unaffordable. Other issues include not planning for their funerals and unrealistic expectations: wanting the best for a loved one but not realising how much when all the costs add up.
In our experience, it is the big Australian-owned, profit-driven companies that are that are hurting people's wallets. But that's not to say no NZ-owned companies are doing the same.
1. Word of mouth. Ask friends and family about their experiences with funeral directors. Read reviews. This can eliminate bad funeral directors.
2. Transparency. From the recommended list, look at the Funeral Director’s websites to see if their prices are clear and transparent. Or, when meeting them, do they discuss all of the costs openly?
3. Get a feel for them. Are they warm, compassionate and respectful? They will be looking after your loved one. You want to know that they will be handled with care.
4. Do they listen to you? Any good funeral director will listen to what you and your family decide and try to make that happen. It doesn't matter if it is outside of the norm and a bit different. They should have a broad understanding of most cultures and religious practices in NZ. Their job is to make it happen - especially if this has been the last request of the deceased person.
5. Do they help you to look at all options? Sometimes, when planning a funeral, emotions are high, and things get missed. A good funeral director will clearly explain the options.
6. Do they have strict time limits? Some funeral homes are busy and have time slots for viewings and ceremonies. There should never be a time limit. Many agree to time limits out of politeness but may have regrets later.
7. Do they allow you to spend time with your loved one as you need? Some funeral homes will pick up the deceased, prepare them and do everything without your involvement. And some people like it that way. However, many will encourage and be open about family members being able to maintain a connection with their loved ones as a way of saying goodbye and helping with the grieving process.
8. Does their facility suit the needs of everyone? Is it big enough? Do they cater? Do they have good parking? Whatever is important to you.
9. Compare prices and shop around. You will be surprised how many funeral homes charge differently for the same products, e.g. Caskets.
10. Do you feel good about them? A good funeral director will understand that you have many things to organise. They will be able to help guide you without overwhelming you. And be able to help you to delegate without taking advantage and charging you the earth.